I Love You too?

Ok…

I’m gonna tell you guys a little secret…judge at your own discretion.

Chick Flicks are one of my favourite movie genres

..next to Romantic comedies.

But I promise action movies, comedy films and you know other cool masculine guy type  stuff are a close 3rd

….*crickets*

Anyways,

For those of you who share my passion for chick flicks (or despise them), we all wonder when that cheesy line will come.

“I Love You”

We see it coming.

We ALWAYS see it coming.

Nevertheless, these three simple words hold enough weight to change the entire mood of a film.

The same argument can be made in reality.

Saying “I love you” can cause so much question, clarity or concern in a romantic relationship between a man and a woman.

So much so that many people run away from those words completely.

What do these words imply?

Is there a difference when these words are uttered in a romantic relationship compared to a brotherly/sisterly one?

If so, what is the difference?

Let’s find some answers…

 

The Greatest Love

Let’s make this as simple as possible.

A wife and a husband sharing the words “I Love You” amongst each other.

What did Christ intend this to mean?

²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Ephesians 5:25

 

Alright.

So in a nutshell, husbands are instructed to love their wives in the same way Christ loved the church.

I typed in that statement ^^ way calmer than I should have, because the love that Christ displayed and continues to display for the church is truly incomprehensible.

Jesus Christ took the form of a man.

Made Himself to be nothing by taking the very nature of a servant.

And if that wasn’t far enough, He humbled Himself by obeying God even unto death…then bore the punishment every single one of us deserved to endure (Philippians 2:6-8; 1 Peter 2:24).

Scripture also says that husbands ought to love their wives following Christ example of sanctifying her through the word (Ephesians 5:26-27)

…this is the love which Apostle Paul is referring to when instructing husbands to love their wives. So let me repeat it again for emphasis.

HUSBANDS ARE INSTRUCTED TO LOVE THEIR WIVES IN THE SAME WAY CHRIST LOVED THE CHURCH!

However I’ve got some good/ bad news for you (depending on how you take it lool).

Husbands are not the only individuals commissioned with this type of love.

No, not just wives either.

ALL believers are called to love each other as Christ loved the church & to lay down our lives for one another.

As a matter of fact it’s in the same chapter

 

Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. ² And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God

Ephesians 5:1-2

The “us” mentioned in the passage above refers to believers or in this case “the saints I Ephesus” (Ephesians 1:1).

In other words, all believers carry the same obligation to unconditionally love one another as Christ loved them, in the same way that husbands are instructed to unconditionally love their wives.

Furthermore, this also emphasizes the necessity for spouses to genuinely love each other in the same way they love their brothers and sisters in Christ.

Read 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 for a clearer understanding of such love.

 

Is there a difference?

 

…but seriously..

You mean to tell me there’s NOTHING different between the love a man shares for his wife and the love he shares for his friends & family in the Lord?

Lool come on now, let’s see what the word of God has to say.

Let your fountain be blessed,
and rejoice in the wife of your youth,
¹⁹     a lovely deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight;
be intoxicated always in her love.

Proverbs 5:18-19

Yes…this is in the Bible.

Listen,

I am not married, nor am I an expert in relationships.

But, you’ll probably agree with me when I say little to no explanation needs to be done here.

All I will say is this:

Clearly,

God does not want men “to be intoxicated in love” with all single women the way it’s described in the passage above. As a matter of fact  Proverbs 15:1-17 provides firm warnings for men to not be lustfully deceived.

God intentionally reserved this level of intimacy and expression of love to be enjoyed within the context of marriage, hence the “rejoice in the wife of your youth”

 Several expressions of this type of love is encouraged throughout all of scripture. Here are some scriptures below :

• Mark 10:6-9
• Songs of Songs 7:6-12
• 1 Corinthians 7:1-40
• Ecclesiastes 9:9
• Song of Solomon 7:1-12
• and honestly the entire book of Song of Solomon lool

 

The Awkward in – Between

So what about the awkward in-between?

Dating, courting, whatever you want to call it.

Individuals who are in a relationship but have yet to marry?

Is the love expressed between such individuals to be any different than the love displayed to other members of the body of Christ?

Biblically speaking, no.

The only difference is that such individuals have (or should have) the intention to one day marry to enjoy the depths of sexual intimacy among other things designed by God (see 1 Corinthians 7 for more).

So much more can be said about this awkward in between, but let’s focus on the major keys for this post.

Love.

Three major lessons drawn here.

1) All Christians are called to love each other in the deepest way…in the same way Christ loved us: Ephesians 5:1-2; 1 John 4:20

2) Love displayed through sexual intimacy is reserved for the marriage bed: Proverbs 5:18-19

3) The deepest form of love (the love God displayed to the church; lesson #1) should be the foundation of a marital relationship: Ephesians 5:25

 

Truth be told, next time you feel inclined to utter the words “I Love You” you probably won’t think of this blog post and start fact (bible) checking.

Let me leave you with one final thought if you forget everything that was mentioned,

The words “I Love You” should be revered within all relationships…not just romantic ones, because the love God expects of us, is the love He’s displayed to us.

..and that’s not an easy thing to do.

We all need grace to love each other the way God expects us to.

 

Soli Deo Gloria